Breast Cancer: The Importance of Self-Exams, Second Opinions, and Prayer: "Lord, whether in my life or in my death, I just want you to use me."

"Approximately 3% of cancer patients participate in clinical trials; but 100% of the treatments available today are the result of clinical trials."

... Dr. Thunder mentioned the possiblity of participating in a clinical trial. If I can, and if insurance isn't an issue... I'd like to. For the women of tomorrow, and as a thank you to all the women before for us who've done so much to help us.

... the coverage doesn't make sense to me.

I'm 41. I have breast cancer.
My grandmother had breast cancer, my mom says she thinks she was 51.
My cousin (the oldest granddaughter, I'm second oldest) has breast cancer. She's younger than 45.

If I was 40 when diagnosed instead of 41... I'd be covered.
(Missed it by just over 3 months)

If my grandmother were < 50... I'd be covered.

If my cousin were my aunt/niece ... I'd be covered.

But their not/I'm not... and, even though my mother doesn't have cancer,

since her daughter is younger than 45
or
since her neice is younger than 45 (either one works)

she has a first or second degree relative with early onset breast cancer, and she'd be covered for the testing.

My mom/sister can get genetic testing because I'm younger than 45... but I can't.

Really, that doesn't make sense to me.

See the pink ribbon in the upper corner of my sight? If you haven't already - please click it. It takes you to a page with a pink button that says "FUND FREE MAMMOGRAMS - Click here daily" Please click...every click is doubled this month - so far 161 free mammograms have been earned.

Results from last surgery.

A - left breast mass was benign :D
B - 1st node was normal :D
C - 2nd node was not. Macrometastatis .2cm - 2 cm (perhaps it is me, but that seems rather vague)...
D - Right breast mass (Area 3) - DCIS 0 margin.
E - Re-excision of Right breast mass (Area 1) DCIS - 1mm margin.

What it means. Well - simply more surgery. Margins aren't good enough, and Area 3 which we previously thought was precancerous - was cancerous - so we're doing a mastectomy & axillary lymph node dissection.

I finally met with an oncologist, and he's scheduling an MRI to take a closer look at the left. He also wants me to have genetic testing done. By the end of all of this it might even be a double mastectomy. When I left the Onc's (Dr. Thunder's) office, I had the impression that he didn't think that the lumpectomy was ever a very good option for me. Makes me wish I'd met him sooner.

Oh, and as much as I didn't want to do this - it seemed only fair to my employer - I went on short term disability this week. Too much testing. Too many surgeries. - I don't have enough vacation/sick leave for it all.

BLOOD

Don't know if it has much to do with Breast Cancer per se - but still found it an interesting reference

I'm hoping to get back into writing and photography soon - need to take the camera in for a checkup. But I found this link, and wanted to share.

"We want artwork that will touch the heart & encourage the spirit." - Oncolink


Hope

... my entry - perhaps.

A short one:

Had surgery a few days ok. Dr. gr8 says he thinks the mass on the left is just a fibroid and will not be an issue. (yeah!) However, this means that Dr. gr8 does have the previously denied ability to make some sort of judgement based on what he sees during the actual surgical procedure. During the first biopsy he wouldn't say one way or the other - and now I'm sure he knew, just wasn't going to say anything until the path results came back. So this time, when I ask about the sentinel nodes (he took two) - he can't say. We just need to wait for the results. I don't have a warm and fuzzy about all of this, not with the swelling and all. If I had to guess, I'm expecting to be going back in to get more nodes taken out. But I need to wait until Thurday to know for sure. I wish I had a more clear timeline of what was going to be happening when. Everything seems to be going so slowly.

As far as the recover goes, my husband has been wonderful. I was hoping to go back to work today, but I almost passed out last night - and that rather freaked me out. I don't have as much energy today, and my drain is bloodier that before - yuk.

Today I paid a visit to Dr. gr8 - just to make sure I understand the process of what's going on, who does what, etc... and to have him check out the lump in my arm and, another lump in my left breast - small enough for me to worry about being paranoid, big enough for me to actually get up the nerve to say something. So, now it looks like he'll be doing a biopsy on the left (yep - he felt it too), a lumpectomy on the right, and if the sentinel node isn't the one that is palpable (though odds seem good that it will be) - he'll be taking out two. I also found out some more info:

He doesn't do frozens since they don't seem to be reliable.

One mass was ER+/PR-/HER2 neu,

One mass was ER+/PR+/HER neu

Now I need to do more research....

said the coworker on finding out about my cancer.

Well, I figure today is just as important as any of the tomorrow's I might be afraid of losing. I'm not ready to lose either one, and I'm not going to let the cancer win that easily.

I know that whatever I'm dealing with, I've had for years and if I hadn't had my exam I'd probably still be walking round thinking everything was fine - instead of the "I can't believe I have cancer" chant that runs beneath and behind every thought. I know that however bad it is, technology is better, treatments are better, and my outlook is better than it would have been years ago. But, I'm still a bit nervous/scared... found a lump in my arm pit this afternoon - I don't think I'm going to be Stage 1 for long. (I'm allowing myself some time - a few hours to a day - to digest bad news - after that it's prayers, and positive thinking - well, that's the plan).

I don't remember Wendie Jo Sperber; but I saw the headline "Bosom Buddies" Wendie Jo Sperber Dies, and though I didn't watch the show that often, I do remember it being on TV. And I knew that she probably wasn't that old - so I clicked. These types of reminders about how deadly breast cancer can be are difficult to deal with - but, since my curiosity about her was peaked - I did more research - and instead of being depressed about what she went through, and what so many women have gone through, and will be going through - I find myself inspired by her desire to make a difference - and hope that I can one day make a difference - do something to improve the life of others - even one other. Finding the good - making lemonade out of lemons, (illuminade) well... that's what I hope to focus on. And I'm sure many women are greatful for the generosity, compassion and love they've received at weSPARK ... thanks Wendie Jo.